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dark Side Fermenters Craft Kombucha

 
 

Whether you’re on the river, in the woods, working around the house, or just getting through your shift—take your weekend to the next level with these staple brews!

 

A-BAY HUSTLE

Color: Coral
Flavor notes: Roasted, spicy, tropical
Kombucha Base: Ceylon black tea
Name: The bustling yet classically laid-back surf community of Arugam Bay on the Eastern shore of sunny Sri Lanka is the inspiration for this special summer flavor.
Most effective for: Strolling the farmer’s market, enduring the Going-to-the-Sun Road traffic, mixing with arrack and then driving a tuk tuk straight toward a herd of elephants. YOLO.

All along the roadsides of Sri Lanka, beautiful ruby red watermelons are halved and hawked by vendors to be eaten by the slice or blended into “juice”. We decided to take advantage of our access to the equally beautiful watermelons grown locally in the Flathead and Mission Valleys and combine them with refreshing coconut water and classic pan roasted Sri Lanka curry, made from a blend of star anise, clove, Ceylon cinnamon, cardamom, and sun-dried red chilis. The advantage to our Sri Lanka style A-BAY HUSTLE is that it’s actually served cold. You’re welcome.

“Life is good man.”

– Raj, owner of Dizzy Surf Shop, A-Bay, Sri Lanka


CHERNOBOG

Color: Twilight purple
Flavor notes: Sweet, earthy, ancient
Kombucha Base: Ceylon black tea
Name: The Slavic equivalent of Darth Vader, the balance to the light, and the foreboding superpower who is responsible for waking the spirits in the 1940 animated interpretation of “Night on Bald Mountain” in Disney’s Fantasia .
Most effective for: Autumn afternoons in the kitchen, apres-ski cocktails, summoning a gathering of supernatural beings for your own diabolical amusement.

Shadowed in mystery, laden with traditional Ukrainian flavors, our ever popular CHERNOBOG kombucha is straight out of a timeworn fable. We take raw, sweet, and simply beautiful red beets grown by our friends at Raven Ridge Farm and blend them with plummy steeped elderberries to achieve the deepest, darkest purple fathomable. The balance to this portentous brew is accomplished through the bright additions of fresh lemon juice, aromatic dill, and the earthy, anise-like punch of caraway.

“The horror! The horror!”

– Joseph Conrad, The Heart of Darkness





LA BÊTE

Color: Blush Pink
Flavor notes: Citrusy, herbal, bucolic
Kombucha Base: Young hyson green tea
Name: La Bête is named after the stunning 1946 film by Jean Cocteau, La Belle et La Bête, based on the 1757 story of Beauty and the Beast.
Most effective for: Pre-game cocktail hours, kombucha mimosas during your petit-dejeuner, cooling your smoking paws after an ill-fated afternoon in the rose garden.

LA BÊTE is a French romantic fantasy come to life in a glass. The sunny tang of fresh grapefruit is steeped with a blend of carefully mixed Herbes de Provence; featuring sweet notes of marjoram and rosemary, pastoral essences of savory and chervil, and a strong layer of woody thyme and sage. The addition of French lavender and dewy rosewater provide an enchanting floral scent to round out the powerful yet tender drinking experience of this truly magical kombucha.

“It speaks four truly magic words, childhood’s “Open Sesame”: Once upon a time…”

– Jean Cocteau, La Belle et La Bête


MELANGE

Color: Indigo
Flavor notes: Peppery, fruity, fragrant
Kombucha Base: Ceylon black tea
Name: MELANGE is named for the planet Arrakis’ coveted spice export in Frank Herbert’s science fiction epic, Dune.
Most effective for: Rewarding post-work cocktails, making new friends at summer barbecues, initiating intergalactic trade wars.

MELANGE, the kombucha that comes from space. This glowing indigo concoction balances the jammy fruit flavor of organic blueberries with the earthy spice of black pepper, the delicate sweetness of pink peppercorns, and the lemony, pungent bite of Sichuan. Top that off with a hypnotic drift of flowery jasmine and you’re on your way to unlocking your own higher awareness through this most illuminating of substances.

“He who controls the spice controls the Universe.”

– Frank Herbert, Dune


BLACK MASS

Color: Scarlet
Flavor notes: Sweet, mossy, dark
Kombucha Base: Ceylon black tea
Name: Don’t read into it too much… Honestly, we’re all just Ulysses fans who’d love to have a pint with Buck Mulligan.
Most effective for: Curling up with a book on a rainy day, lunch time pick-me ups, hanging out with friends after a mid-winter boar sacrifice.

The BLACK MASS is by far our darkest flavor, made with the cloying, inky juice of Flathead sweet cherries and carefully spiced with cinnamon, clove and smoked paprika; added to simulate the wafting incense of the Middle Ages. The centuries old aroma of this sanguine elixir is completed by organic notes of Irish moss, providing a brackish essense that makes this take on the Flathead Valley classic truly unique.

“One big medieval mess!”

– Merlin, The Sword in the Stone


JAL JEERA

Color: Golden orange
Flavor notes: Tart, earthy, exotic
Kombucha Base: Ceylon black tea
Name: Named after the Indian drink it’s based on, JAL JEERA translates from Hindi to “cumin water”.
Most effective for: Lackadaisical river floats, revitalizing post-trail run/ride refreshments, taking a pause from your life mission to rid the earth of the Rakshasa class.

Our take on the classic Indian beverage, JAL JEERA is a spiced lemonade that leans on the verdant flavors of fresh mint and cilantro as well as the spicy tang of ginger to compliment the fragrant earthiness of cumin, fennel, and black pepper. The amchoor (dried green mango powder), fresh lemon juice, and tamarind round out this complex blend of flavors by adding a bright and biting tartness. JAL JEERA was thought to have been invented on the shores of the Ganges in northern India, and is still popular to this day because of its “cooling properties”.

“...the atmosphere was transformed for the rest of their passage and they felt as if they were wading through a cool stream with a southern summer breeze blowing in their faces.”

– R. K. Narayan, from The Ramayana: A Shortened Modern Prose Version of the Indian Epic


LOTUS EATER

Color: Fuchsia
Flavor notes: Floral, fragrant, bright
Kombucha Base: Gunpowder green tea
Name: In Greek mythology, the Lotus Eaters were a race of people who lived off the lotus plant, and, because of its narcotic qualities, were reduced to peaceful apathy.
Most effective for: A long day working in the garden, patio time, abandoning your reality for a life of listless complacency.

The only thing more intoxicating than the fragrant bouquet our LOTUS EATER kombucha emits is its electric blossom of color. The taste of each botanical used seems to shine through evenly: a blend of rose, lavender, jasmine, chamomile, and hibiscus. Overall, the sun-soaked LOTUS EATER is a bright, slightly sweet, and heavily aromatic beverage that perfectly compliments a dreamy summer’s afternoon.

“...so delicious that those who ate of it left off caring about home…”

– from The Odyssey of Homer


MISTY MOUNTAIN HOP

Color: Light jade
Flavor notes: Hoppy, grassy, citrusy
Kombucha Base: Gunpowder green tea
Name: We just want everyone to stay for tea and have some fun.
Most effective for: Lake days, stocking the post-hike car cooler, trashing a hotel room like you own this city.

Dry hopped with a blend of fresh Cascade and Centennial cones, the MISTY MOUNTAIN HOP has slight notes of peppery bitterness that are mellowed by nutty and citrusy coriander seed and the sweetness of local honey. This beautiful green kombucha gets its fresh color from matcha tea, which also adds a subtle grassy taste that blends seamlessly with the floral aroma of the hops. The sparkling, champagne-esque carbonation of the finished beverage puts this fresh and simple hopped kombucha over the top.

“And baby, baby, baby, do you like it?”

– Robert Plant, Sexual beacon/Led Zeppelin lead vocals